Tuesday, September 21, 2010

El Cojudo

During my first week at INCAE I mad the rounds meeting new students/faculty and answering all the obligatory Questions: Where are you from? Where have you worked? How was the trip? What do you like to do for fun? Which house are you living in?

They were all fairly common exchanges until we hit a pivotal question. What follows usually went something like this:

Who is your roommate?


My roommate? Er... Oscar.

Oscar? From where?

Bolivia.

Ohhhhhh. El Cojudo!

What? What does that mean!?

Oh Nothing. Oscar, he has a certain, special... Hmmm. Charisma, I think is the best way to put it.

Great.

Well Oscar, as it turns out, is a lanky 6'3" Bolivian with size 14 shoes and the voice of a howler money. The figure that most immediately popped into my mind after I met Oscar was Lurch from the Adams Family. Tall, intimidating but mostly harmless. If only I could say the same about his voice. Of the 7 other MBA's in my house, Oscar speaks the least English and his Bolivian accent is the hardest to understand in Spanish. When he does speak his sentences usually start with a string of Spanish slangs and profanities that I can't bring myself to translate for you here.

His morning routine is fairly basic:

Wake up.
Clear giant sinuses in a series of what I can only imagine is nose-blowing and, in the process, accidentally wake me up.
Stumble around the room knocking things over and making a ruckus.
Find his way to the shower.
Get in without remembering that the water temperature in our house fluctuates from hot to cold by the minute.
Inevitably get blasted by cold water within the first 2 minutes of showering.
Shout another seamless string of profanities in a voice that always manages to reminds me of Tarzan's yelp before he swings off through the trees.
Wake the whole house up with this noise.
Put on clothes, drink some kind of protein shake and head off to class.

Yes. This is my life. Every morning.

As for the meaning of El Cojudo? It's slang for something between an idiot and a crazy person.

El Cojudo. He has that special Charisma, that's for sure....

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